Agony
by Thatredheadgeek
Summary: the next installment of Lady Loki/Clint Barton. Before she was abandoned on earth, Before Clint found her, helped her, made her life more amazing then she thought possible. before that, was pain. Warning: Graphic torture and rape. read at your own risk.


**3 years earlier **

Loki tried to dig his heels into the golden floor, to stop himself from being dragged to his worst fears. He was already humiliated, stripped of his clothing. He growled like a rabid cat, struggling. "Let go of me!" The guards only held tighter as they got to the large metal door, opening it with a creek as he was thrown into the impossibly dark room. Then the door closed and he was left with nothing. Darkness everywhere and surrounding and so so dark. He couldn't even see his hand in front of his face. He started pounding on the door, panicking. "Let me out of here! Let me out! Please!" His fists slowly lost there strength as the fear overtook him. He sobbed, feebly pounding against the door. He heard voices outside the door, stopping his tears a moment to listen. It was Odin talking to the guards.

"I have grown weary of his trouble causing. He has hurt countless people, innocent people, bathed them in blood. Blood he will never get off his hands. He is to be punished, to the full extent you can give. When you are done, bring him to me." The guards nodded. "Yes, your majesty." Odin walked away, leaving the guards alone to smirk with the shared, silent sick ideas. They waited, hours they left Loki in that pitch black room. Loki wasn't sure how long he had been trapped in there. Hours, days. He jumped, hearing a growling in the impossibly dark room. He curled, looking around frantically. "No..no, no... please...

It was another day before they opened the door, hurting Loki's eyes, making him curl up before forcing himself to open his eyes, only to realize there was nothing in the room then himself. A mind trick. Then the door locked and once his eyes adjusted he swallowed down his fear as there was five men, all holding a different weapon. A whip, a jagged knife, a wooden staff that was used in fighting, a large golden tub filled with liquid that was steaming and gloves that were clawed with blades. He shook in fear, trying in vain to back away but the one with the whip took long strides, gripping his hair tightly...too tight... Loki yelped in pain, groaning as he was dragged before being thrown to the men.

The one that held his hair walked around him, feeling the whip up and down and he walked circles around Loki like prey with a smirk. "well, what should we do first? So many choices isn't there?" The rest agreed with mumbles and nods. Loki was shaking as he watched these men. One of them saw a golden pole, a support beam. He smirked. "Tie him up, make him bleed out his sins." The one holding the whip smirked, grabbing Loki by his hair, dragging him over to the pole. Loki fought back weakly. "Ah stop... let me go..." The man got him to the pole, tying him up to it with metal cuffs. Loki tried to fight back, to break the chains but it just resulted in loud clanking in the room. The men laughed at his attempt, making him blush with embarrassment. He knows it won't be last of humiliation. He was so lost in his own thoughts he couldn't fight off a scream as the whip came down on his back. He whimpered, feeling the blood leak out of him, the burn and agony from one lash. His body trembled. They laughed and the man continued whipping, unending, unrelenting. _Agony._ He hated himself, gripping the pole like a life line as they pulled screams from his throat. And when his voice gave out it turned to pained whimpers.

One shouted something about doing his front, Loki wasn't sure. He was _bleeding_ and _burning_ and blood was rushing in his ears and then he felt the sting on his face and chest, jumping and whimpering and crying so pathetically. He yelped each time it hit his face and each time he would try to hide his face in his arms only for one of them to force his head to face the man with the whip. He sobbed, begging. And he hated himself for being so weak as to beg.. "Please...please stop..."

And they stopped.

And it terrified Loki most then anything as he looked up at the man in front of him, blood splattered all over his front and face and hands and _dear gods that was his blood._ He wanted to be sick. The man smirked. "You heard him. We'll stop...but those cuts are gonna need cleaned, wouldn't want you to get an infection." Loki trembled, hearing one of them walking over with the steaming bowl. They each grabbed a cloth, soaking it before bringing it to his bloodied and worn body. He tried so hard not to scream out or cry in pain. Salt water. And they were wiping off the excess blood, not too gently either. He saw it drip onto the floor tinted pink slowly turning to red. Then when they were done they threw the remainder of the water on his face, making him gasp and whimper in pain and go ridged. They laughed as the water dripped from his face and hair to the floor, making more pink. _More red. _

_Drip_

_Drip. _

Then the handcuffs were off and he was being thrown to the floor. He yelped, more whimpers, more laughter, _more blood_ smearing against the floor. Then claws were on his hips, the man with the bladed gloves and they dug in and forced him to the floor. He whined and whimpered as hands felt him, making him bleed and hurt and then fingers were entering him, stretching him so painfully he thought he had gone numb. Until he felt the blunt head of the guards cock pushed into him, slowly and so painful he thought he was being ripped in-half. He gasped, whining, gripping the floor feebly, unable to catch. The floor smeared and slick with his blood from the many wounds from the whip. He sobbed, crying into the floor. But then they stopped, why? His eyes darted around the room, trying to figure out why they stopped. Then the one inside him spoke, gripping his hair as he spoke in his ear. "Don't worry, we'll get started soon enough and were gonna make sure you enjoy every part of it like the freak you are. _Jotun_." Then man spat on his face before reaching around and feeling his limp member, stroking it slowly.

Loki felt his lip tremble and bile rise up, feeling every cut and wound leak with blood. He wished the man had made it hurt, made it brutal. Made this rape agony. But he waited until his body adjusted, gentle and stroked him into hardness, started thrusting gently, slowly making sure to find that spot that made him see stars. Then once it was found and a whimper of pleasure escaped, he thrust harder, hitting it each time. He bit his lip to keep from moaning as the mans cock slid in and out of him. The others gathered around,stroking themselves or laughing lowly. He felt his face flush with humiliation and tears fall over his bloodied face. A hand started stroking him, making a moan escape him. He shook his head, not wanting to come like this, with all of them watching, laughing, pleasuring themselves to his pain. He gasped as a hard thrust to his prostate made him come, spurting onto the floor. He felt the man inside him groan, coming within his abused entrance before pushing him into his own come on the floor. He heard some other of the men in the room moan before coming on his back, stinging his wounds.

He wasn't sure which one grabbed his hair so roughly, yanking his head back, speaking into his ear roughly. "You are nothing but a whore. A freak. Were gonna leave you here and get some rest but we'll be back." His head was thrown as they started walking out of the room, turning off any light there was. Then he was left in the pitch black. The nothing. All he could feel was the throbbing of his entire body. The bleeding never seemed to stop and his body shuddered with sobs, curling in on himself, trying in vain to be nothing.

He was sure how long he was in there for, maybe days. Maybe hours. But one of them came in, growling and beating him with that stick used for fighting. He whimpered and yelped but he was out of strength to fight back, to scream. He could barely hear the mans yelling over the blood rushing thru his ears and pain burning thru his entire being. Then two more men came in, the lights coming on. He felt hands keeping him down and a saw a needle and thread and he wondered _terrifyingly_ what they were going to do with it. Then one held his face and the panic made him fight. "No...no...please..." Then they were holding his lips and dear Gods...the pain...the needle went thru his lips, the thread going thru tender, bleeding skin. He tried to scream but the one holding his head and lips smirked. "Sorry freak, you already got the privilege of screaming." Loki sobbed silently as they sewn his mouth shut.

He must have blacked out because when his eyes opened he was being dragged to the throne room and thrown before Odin. He was so gone with pain and numbness, he barely could hear as his adoptive father speak. He thought he heard something about "weaker sex" and "earth" but before he could register anything he was being thrown thru light, and it hurt. It hurt so bad he wanted to scream. The light made this high pitched, whining sound and it hurt his ears and so bright he thought he'd go blind and every wound stung like it was fresh until it stopped and he was feeling grass and dew and air. He wanted to sob but he was breathing too fast, looking around frantically. Where was he? People started to gather, watching. Watching meant hurting but he couldn't move. He hurt too much. He cold only try and watch them all, shaking and trembling.

Then the crowd in front of him parted and his eyes widened. Clint Barton. Hawkeye. He remembers him, he took over his mind when he attempted to take over earth. He shook his head in disbelief. Why would he want to help him of all people? The archer started to kneel down, looking so concerned and determined. "My name is Clint, I'm here to help you, Ok?" He watched him, tried getting a read on him, was he tricking him?Was he really going to kill him by pretending to help? He deserved death, wished for death. Away from this pain. Away from the guilt. So he nodded. Then his life changed in such away he could never even dream of it. Imagine it. But it was so much better then death.

**Present time**

Loki sat, knees up to her chin as she finished recalling her horrible tale to Clint, who sat in front of her. Hands clenching and unclenching. She didn't want to be touched or held as she spoke. Knowing the rage that would surly be going thru him. Wanting to protect something thats already been broken. For so long he wanted to know what actually happened, not just a trigger here and there to get an idea. But now, he wanted to go and kill each ad every one of those fuckers. Loki spoke, her voice shaking. "Now you know. You know what has made me so broken." "No." Loki looked up, her lip trembling as he moved from the chair to the couch, wrapping an arm around her, his other tilting her head to look him in the eye.

He spike quietly. "Your not broken. Damaged, maybe. But never broken. And because of it, look where you are. On earth living a hell of a better life then that on Asguard. You have a real family, a husband and our two little babies are asleep." Loki smiled, a few tears falling as she spoke. Her voice breaking. "If it wasn't for that I wouldn't be here." She paused, swallowing the lump. "It's still terrifying. I still wake up and feel the salt water over my wounds but then I check on our babies and I feel better. At peace. I think the same thing every time. Id go thru that over and over again if it meant being here with you and Gabriela and Balder and...everyone." Clint wiped her tear's away, wrapping her up in his arm, safely, protectively, kissing her head as she started to cry into his shoulder. The memories would never fade or get better but her future looked so much brighter.

An: reviews would be awesome! I know, i'm horrible for writing this.


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